Separate beds, please.
The husband and I arrived recently at a hotel for a quick getaway. We got to our hotel room, and he sighed, confessing that he regrettably forgot to ask for a king bed; this room had two queen beds. I shrugged and replied, “Eh, so what? No biggie.” Truth be told, his regret was a bit perfunctory. We’re married–we sleep in the same bed. All the time. It’s nice to make use of the two beds and sleep separately every now and then.
My mother-in-law finds it hilarious that when we visit her in Canada, my husband sleeps in his old bedroom, and I sleep in his brother’s old bedroom. I like my brother-in-law’s old room better; it’s where I slept during my visits while my husband and I were dating and while we were engaged–we weren’t married yet, so sleeping in the same bed would have elicited inescapable disapproval from the in-laws. Well, I got used to “my room” over the years and it’s the only place I’ll sleep when I go on my twice-a-year visits to the Great White North. My husband hates his brother’s old room. “I hate Cris’s mattress,” he often tells me. “It hurts my back. I’m gonna sleep in my room.” I chuckle and respond, “It’s fine! You know I don’t mind. Why are we even discussing this?” See, in the beginning after we got married, we used to have that same song and dance when we visited as husband and wife: I was adamant about sleeping in my brother-in-law’s room, and my husband adamantly refused. We didn’t want to hurt each other’s feelings. Fortunately, we’re open with each other and agreed that sleeping separately sometimes doesn’t mean we have a doomed marriage or that we don’t like each other’s company. Rather, it means getting to stretch out completely once in a while. It means that he can watch TV until late while he falls asleep (I dislike TV in the bedroom), and I get to enjoy reading until very late in peaceful quiet (he dislikes silence).
So sleeping in two beds when two beds present themselves may be funny, but it’s not weird. It doesn’t mean we have poor communication, or a relationship rife with insecurity. We like to think of it as a rare opportunity to get the type of cryogenic sleep that we used to get as teenagers before we were saddled with life’s tough decisions and challenges. Separate beds? Yes, please. Every now and then.
People with significant others, do you ever sleep separately by choice?
**Photo credit: Two of absolutely everything except the cat and the wall at grandpa’s house in florida by boltron
Olive
January 26, 2011Hey Lise,
I can’t recall if this situation has occured with me and Mario but I’m sure we would welcome it. He’s a light sleeper and I’m a heavy one who has a tendencing to move alot! I am the worst person to bunk with, been told this all my life.
PS…i must be a slut…when mario lived with his mom and I slept over it was in his room! hehehe…still not married to him and I live in sin every weekend! haha love it.
sunnyglobaldiva
January 27, 2011Olive, yes–two people hardly ever have the same sleeping habits, and often mess up each other’s sleep! Sleeping separately sometimes lets the lighter sleeper get a good night’s rest!
And as for living in sin…I’d expect nothing less from you, LOL. I’m sure Mario’s mom is just more laid-back than the folks up north!
Patricia R Lamothe
January 27, 2011Hey darling,
Well what an interesting concept. I never thought of it that way. infact we lived together before we got married and even than when we went to cap haitian his mother’s room has two beds and the fact that we were not married she would sleep in one of the beds and us on the other and she would say every night good night and pas de desorde lol… but actually never deliberately slept in different bedrooms. I will try one of these days 😉
sunnyglobaldiva
January 27, 2011“Pas de desorde”…that’s hilarious! 🙂
Kattsby
January 28, 2011We’ve lived in sin for seven years now, here in the Great White North 🙂
Many times during our travels, two beds have presented themselves. Sometimes we’ve only slept in one of them … We never thought much about it.
If my husband was snoring, I wouldn’t hesitate sleeping in another room. I know what that’s like… it’s terror.
sunnyglobaldiva
January 28, 2011I understand the snoring terror all too well, LOL 😉
And to answer your question about the theme…my husband made it. He’s a graphic designer, so I’m blessed to have his talents at close reach!
Kattsby
January 28, 2011PS: Have you made the theme yourself? It’s very neat…
Kattsby
January 28, 2011Cool! 🙂
I have this self-hosted WordPress, but I don’t know how to make WP-themes. Sometimes I think I could read up on it … there’s a lot written about it, but there are thousands of ready-made ones that are really good … I like the one I have now because there I can customize it with own graphics, without having to know anything about .php
Anthony Kimber
January 31, 2011Oh yeah, sometimes the wife likes to read late, sometimes she gets a tickle in the middle of the night, and I’m a light sleeper….I still love her in the morning, and she still thinks I’m all that. No biggie, 23years later!
sunnyglobaldiva
January 31, 2011“I still love her in the morning, and she still thinks I’m all that.” Can I steal that for future use? It’s awesome.